The Break Up Letter

Dear Ryan,

          I cannot even begin to tell you how good of a boyfriend you really are. You’re just so rude, arrogant, inconsiderate, conceded, self-centered, irritating, needy, and just a down right “jerk” (I would say something else but that would be mean). Those are some movie star qualities right there. I bet every girl in the world wishes that they had someone just like you. I’m obviously so lucky to have you in my life. I don’t know what I’d do without you! I honestly don’t even deserve you. You care so much about my feelings and you would never do anything to hurt me. You always know how to put a smile on my face and turn that frown upside down.

          We have had some really good and interesting times. From that one day that you ignored me at the beach, to the other day that you ignored me at our friend’s house, and even the day that you ignored me at our other friend’s house! I love being ignored so much, it makes me feel so special! It makes me feel so loved! I especially loved every single one of the cute little dates you took me on. You were always being a gentleman and opening doors, and even buying me a few little things here and there.

          Now I think that I’m just not good enough for you anymore. You deserve someone who will put up with all of the crap you would put them through and I just don’t think I can give that to you anymore. I can’t do anything right and I’m sorry for that. I hope you find someone who is perfect for you and I hope that you want the same for me too.

Without love,

Carly

 

P.S. I hate you<3

Revenge

          Imagine this. You are dating this guy or girl right? You’ve been dating for a few months, they tell you that they love you blah, blah, blah. Then you find them and your so called “best friend” in a car, just sitting there making out. You can’t believe it. You feel a hundred different emotions. Mostly you’re hurt and sad. Then all the sadness wears of f and you finally stop crying. Now you’re angry, furious, fuming. You know what happens next? You start plotting your revenge. Everyone tells you, “Oh don’t let it affect you. You don’t need them anyway. They don’t deserve you. Karma will get them.” You know what I think? Karma takes too long, and plus revenge is more fun.

 

      I don’t need to tell you what revenge is. You already know what it is. Actually I guarantee that every single person that reads this has tried to get revenge on someone in some way shape or form. It may not be very drastic like say killing someone because that is a littttttttttttttttttttttle extreme; it could be as simple as getting back at your brother or sister. I also guarantee that, if not all of you then most of you, have had someone get revenge on you. But hey that’s just my opinion.

      Revenge is the basis for a lot of things. People write songs about it, books about it, television shows, and several movies in which revenge is the theme.

       For example, The Dark Knight is a well known movie based on revenge. In the movie one of the main characters seeks revenge because he believes everything has been taken from him.

 

Intense right? You should watch it, it's a great movie!

 

 

      Another great movie based on revenge is Taken. Taken is about a retired CIA agent, whose daughter gets taken and he tries to find her and seek revenge on the people who took her.

 

But seriously. Watch it. Like soon. Not even kidding.

 

 

      There’s also this tv show called Revenge. I mean I guess you could say it’s kind of based on revenge.. oh I’m so funny! This show is about a girl whose father has been killed. She moves to a town where she knows the Grayson’s live. She knows that the Grayson’s were associated with her fathers murder. So of course she seeks revenge. Like I  said before nothings more fun than revenge.

 

This show is also a must watch; OBVIOUSLY!

 

 

      There are also plays based off of the concept of revenge. William Shakespeare is very well known for writing plays on revenge. One of his most famous revenge plays is called Hamlet. What makes it a revenge play is that throughout the entire play, Hamlet is plotting his revenge on his uncle who has not only killed his father, but married his mother and become the king.


     
So let’s recap.

o   Karma = boring

o   Revenge = fun

o   What is the dictionary definition of revenge? The action of inflicting hurt or harm on someone for a wrong suffered at their hands.

o   Revenge is portrayed through music, movies, everyday life, etc.

I think that that is all I have to say on the subject. I suppose I will stop boring you now.

Oh! And don’t forget..

"Revenge is sweet and not fattening." ~ Alfred Hitchcock

I hope you all have a lovely day!

 

 



Satire

Satire? What the heck is this, “satire”nonsense? Satire is the literary work holding up human vices and follies to ridicule and scorn. Now what on earth did I Just say? I don’t even know I think I’m going crazy... oh well. Just kidding! I know what I’m talking about. Sort of… But really, anyway, in other words satire is the critique of human behavior shown by pointing out the humor and stupid things that people do. You still don’t get it though do you? I probably wouldn’t, oh wait I already don’t… but shhh no one needs to know that. But don’t worry. I hereby promise that in this very blog post, you will fully understand the topics of satire. If I fail to do so, I will permit you to throw me off a bridge. Not really that was sarcasm…See what I did there! Haha I am so funny! See you actually use satire a lot more than you would think. You are probably sarcastic at least once a day in some way. But, DID YOU KNOW that satire comes in many other forms. You don’t have to tell me I already know... I totally just BLEW you’re mind. It’s okay, you can admit it. You want to know some other examples? No? Okay here are some anyway. One very popular form of satire is a parody. I’m pretty sure everyone knows what a parody is. You make a video making fun of something. It could be a movie...

Twilight Parody

Or a song…

How Low Parody, Tik Tok Parody

It could be a lot of things! Parodies are great ways of making something or someone look extremely, for lack of a better word, stupid. For example one of the links above is of a twilight parody. Many people are absolutely obsessed with Twilight and many people find it really, once again for a lack of a better word, dumb. I have also posted a link to a parody of the song, “How Low” above. In this particular parody the maker of the video thinks that rapping is stupid and that all they do is say words really fast. Which I admit is true probably fifty percent of the time. The third link above that I have posted is a link to another parody by the same person. This time it is a parody of the son, "Tik Tok." I personally find this particular video very funny. I think that his version of the song is the perfect parody. The words to his version are just so random and make the song sound unbelievably stupid, as horrible as that may sound. But that's just my opinion.

As I stated before, satire comes in many different forms. Another way satire can be shown is through literature. For example, the story of Huckleberry Finn is satire in a large part. The novel pokes fun at many different things. In this novel, Twain mocks several things, slavery and family feuds being two of the many. Twain uses the characters Jim and Huck to show the poor treatment of slaves. In the case of the family feud, Twain's version is meant to be laughed at in my opinion. The feud in the novel is absolutely pointless, stupid, and silly. This example of satire is meant to show the stupidity of human nature.